It may be tempting to prioritize what others think of you above alternative options, such as what you believe is best. Like all forms of dishonesty, the full effects of prioritizing the opinion of others are far worse than they may seem.
The desire to be treated better than you would if you presented yourself to be as you really are is just one specific kind of greed. By fostering it, you are feeding it, and soon what seems like a manageable amount of the vice will spiral into less-manageable and more harmful forms. The gradient of greed includes lying, stealing, and even murdering.1 While it’s obvious that pretense does not always advance past lying, know that this is the dangerous road you choose when you pretend to be more or better than you are.
Ironically, living so as to please others always leads to treating others worse than you would if you were honest about who you really are.2 This should not be surprising. When you pretend to be different than you are, it’s never for those you are attempting to please. Deceit is always a selfish desire where you lie to get others to treat you better than they otherwise would. If you really care about other people, invest less effort in manipulating their opinion of you, and more effort in being who you really are around them.
The best way to care less about what others think is to become a coherent person. When you align your beliefs, desires, and actions, you will enjoy the constant assurance that you are on the right path and doing the right things for the right reasons, so far as you know, no matter what the rest of the world says or does or thinks.
Footnotes
- 1. But behold, it is to get gain, to be praised of men, yea, and that ye might get gold and silver. And ye have set your hearts upon the riches and the vain things of this world, for the which ye do murder, and plunder, and steal, and bear false witness against your neighbor, and do all manner of iniquity. (Helaman 7:21) ↩
- 2. For they saw and beheld with great sorrow that the people of the church began to be lifted up in the pride of their eyes, and to set their hearts upon riches and upon the vain things of the world, that they began to be scornful, one towards another, and they began to persecute those that did not believe according to their own will and pleasure. (Alma 4:8) ↩